Too Many Fish in the Sea

As I said in my previous post, being gay, I have often felt like I was the last of an extinct species. An attractive girl will catch my eye, someone who makes my stomach chrysalises sprout their butterflies, and moments later her boyfriend will walk up and my butterflies will drop dead as if someone has sprayed insecticide.This often happens and though I still hold an admiration and attraction to the girl, I know I would never stand a chance.
But what about the attractive girls who don't have boyfriends walking beside them? I can't exactly assume they are gay, but assuming they are straight leaves me to take no chances. Assuming neither only leaves me uncertain, not sure how to proceed.
How am I to find someone who would even have a slight possibility of being interested in me when they are camouflaged in the sea of "fish". Along with normal fears of being rejected, comes fears of offending and putting yourself in harms way by admitting your sexuality.
So how can gay people find dates without exhausting their network of friends? Personally, I display that aspect of myself in a necklace, unfortunately not always visible, and occasionally wear other pride-wear such as a rainbow-studded belt and a carefully arranged collection of colored bracelets.
The gay's fight for civil rights is often compared to black people's fight for civil rights, but this is one detail they didn't have to go through. The fear of asking won't fade, I think, for at least a few more decades. Even in finding other gay people, you suspicions may not always be true, and there will, at least for a while, be that fear holding you back when you really want to ask "are you gay?"